Kitty Routines

It's super sweet that the kitties are on the same daycare schedule as the kids now. 

They line up (in front) of the kids when it's time to go outside and wait patiently until everyone is ready and I open the door. 

They put themselves to bed now when it's naptime. We used to carry them to bed, but now they seem to sense when lunch is just about over and they go lay down on their own. Sleepy kitties. 

They come sit at the table on the bench when lunch is being put on the table, their little heads peeking over the edge to see what's being served- accept they get shooed away, silly kitties, you don't eat at the table! :-) 

Snack Tray this Week

This week we're having a new snack tray combo that is too yummy not to blog about. Inspired by this photo, I see only all my favorite foods!

Apples, avocado, pecans, almonds, mangos, cranberries, raspberries, and beets on a bed of greens. I could have this for every meal and never get tired of it! I hope the kiddos like it, too!

Not my picture, but this WILL be my tray! Mwahahaha!!

Best of all it's dairy, soy and gluten free, and deliciously vegan! 

Spring Cleaning

This weekend Alex and I spent several hours cleaning out the garage. We were both sore and tired by the end of it all, but in a good way. Alex actually put himself to bed last night which almost never happens. That kid was pooped. I dare not post pictures here of the before because it was positively shameful. 

Last summer we went to lots of yard sales and thrift stores. It was a fun hobby for us to look for treasures together, haggling over pennies and nickles. Ahhh. Good times. But with that haggling came great bargains and an accumulation of 'stuff'. 

For a few years I have tried to simplify our lives and eliminate extraneous 'stuff', almost at all costs- brutally discarding things that I really liked but knew I had not used in eons or ever. I'm one of those people that comes home from shopping and leaves bags in the trunk or stashes them in a closet and forgets about them- only to buy them again a few months later, and discovers when we move or during Spring Cleaning that I have multiples of brand new things. But few times have I brutally discarded things with any lasting regret. 

So when all our 'stuff' that had collected in the garage over the past year became too much I really didn't have much difficulty parting with most of it this weekend. And actually I found several things I had been missing- the plug adapters for the keyboard so you can plug in regular headphones, some of Alex's Kindergarten artwork that must have fallen out when we moved in, a love letter my oldest daughter wrote to Alex years ago on a napkin when we were at a restaurant together, two new packs of wooden skewers, much hunted for tools, yard sale treasures I dared not part with they were so precious and yet somehow forgotten until I found them again, and a couple of burned CDs with pictures and videos of Alex as a baby and getting his first hair cut.  

Actually, the real mountain of 'stuff' was Alex's collection of recyclable materials he planned to use 'one day' for 'something'. Building rocket ships, jet packs, science experiments, eco-friendly housing for his future adult self (and family, of course)- he had grand plans. Grand plans indeed.  But the reality was most of it was just sitting in a giant pile by the back door and fell over on top of you everytime you tried to make your way to the car. He never actually used the materials for anything. Classic pack-ratidness. So it was a use-it or lose-it situation and Alex was quick to agree it had gotten out of hand. Thank the stars for little miracles. No showdown needed this time. 

Alex's pile was not unlike Beatrice Lestrange's Gringotts vault in Harry Potter's Deathly Hallows where they were forced to overcome a mountain of gold and jewels to reach their goal. Except instead of gold, I was wading through empty laundry containers, plastic food containers (cleaned of course), oatmeal rounds, boxes, pringles cans, jars, old wiring, boxes, random knobs, plugs and switches, boxes, milk jugs, 2-liter bottles, boxes, packing styrofoam, bubble wrap, boxes, kitty litter boxes and did I mention BOXES?

Luckily most everything we had to ditch was already bound for the recycle heap and our recycle bin was empty thanks to Alex's determination to never let me throw any recyclable item away, even in the recycle bin. With both garbage can and recycle bin full to the brim we rolled them out to the curb for today's pick-up. We can now see the floor and walls again and walk freely in the garage without it feeling like an obstacle course. Yay!

And best of all I have my makeshift art studio back again, which has been sitting dormant since last Summer because I couldn't get to it after the yard sale season ended. I LOVE doing my woodworking and art in the garage on Summer days with the garage door open a little, and the side door propped open with this misshapen but loveable wood stump, and having my music on.

Next weekend we will tackle the bedrooms. My room in particular. That is the place where all things eventually come to be stored because it's the closest room to the main area and a quick place to stash 'stuff' when company visits. A few weekends ago I did get through my closet, but all I really managed to do was empty my closet of non-essentials and move them outside to the main room. We all know by now that clutter makes for a stressful space. And I endeavor to never have stress whenever I can. So tackle it I must. Thankfully Spring is here and I am motivated to do my annual Spring Cleaning and re-simplify my home so we can have the laziest days possible through the Summer.

Another Case for Why We (I) Might One Day Become Vegan

Elephants, cows, horses, rhino's, hippos, gorillas, zebras 

and giraffes......They are all Vegans and attain 100% of their 

protein, amino acids and nutrition from plants and only 

plants. And maybe the occasional accidental bug. :-)

What We Did Today

I've been hearing some grumblings about my meals lately from the daycare kiddos. Even my most loyal eaters have become less than enthusiastic lately. 

So today I broke up the monotony and surprised them with a breakfast feast for lunch- bacon, eggs, fresh fruit, and fun custom pancakes in the shape of happy faces, hearts, trees, worms, stars, triangles, squares, and puppies. I'm no artist but I can't deny the fact that my pancake designs rocked awesomeness. I had planned on making sausage and toast as well but I thought that was overkill. 

For afternoon snack I surprised them with la-la-la-lasagna (that's how we say it), instead of the same old snack tray of fresh fruits and veggies. They ate ALL of the lasagna- it was a pretty big casserole dish, big enough to feed a family of 8...twice. Some kids had eight helpings. Why have I never served lasagna at snack before??! Plus I realized I am not running a childcare. I am running an animalcare. There were no children at the table this afternoon. Only wild, lasagna-crazed animals.

Then we made fresh lemonade with raw honey. And  the kids helped pour the honey and squeeze the lemons. And they taste tested the honey and lemons, of course.

There were many loud and happy raves to follow. Success! They love me again. :-) I look forward to having more days like today. :-)

Daylight Savings This Sunday

Spring daylight savings is not my favorite. Anything that snatches away an hour of my day must be sneered at and grumbled about. So to channel my frustration, I wrote a little haiku. Enjoy! :-).

You'll be missed, Hour. 

Please return to me in Fall. 

For now, I will mourn!

OTC Children's Medications & Their Hidden Side Effects

Unless you or your child has had an obvious reaction to a medication, most parents rarely read the full warning blurb on the bottles and boxes of their children's medication. But even if they did read them, it wouldn't inform them very well of all the known side effects of that drug, as most labels refer you to their website for the complete list. Often the website list is also incomplete, and you are asked to send a request by mail to receive a booklet with all of the legal discolsure information. 

Most people trust that if a drug is on the shelf or prescribed by their doctor, it must be safe, so they don't question it too much. But many side effects look just like the symptoms of a child who doesn't feel well, like fussiness, upset tummy, trouble sleeping, aggression, constipation, diarrhea, moodiness, irritability, and crying such as due to a headache, which a young child can't express verbally. Many side effects are usually disregarded for that very reason, and so parents use the medication over and over with no idea of the adverse reaction their child is having to it. 

The best way to minimize the risk of side effects is to be very conservative when administering medications to a child. Always read labels, websites and literature and carefully monitor your child after administering a dose, checking for reactions and keeping a log. Never hesitate to contact your health care professional if you suspect your child is experiencing a side effect. Educate yourself on natural and herbal remedies that are safer and more gentle for children with minor illnesses. Try using a certified and licensed Holistic Practitioner or Naturopath. Of course you should always check with your doctor before giving your child any herb or substance that they have never had before.      

Aside from food dyes like Red 40 which cause a whole host of behavior and health problems all by themselves, and are commonly found in children's medication... 

Medications taken for such things as pain, allergies or asthma may have other less known, more hidden side effects that affect behavior such as:

Singulair  per their website has these side effects:

“SINGULAIR may cause serious side effects. Behavior and mood-related changes have been reported: agitation including aggressive behavior or hostility, bad or vivid dreams, depression, disorientation (confusion), feeling anxious, hallucinations (seeing or hearing things that are not really there), irritability, restlessness, sleepwalking, suicidal thoughts and actions (including suicide), tremor, and trouble sleeping. Tell your healthcare provider right away if you have any of these symptoms while taking SINGULAIR.”

Children’s Benadryl per drugs.com has these side effects:

“Constipation; diarrhea; dizziness; drowsiness; dry mouth, nose, and throat; excitability; headache; loss of appetite; nausea; nervousness or anxiety; trouble sleeping; upset stomach; vomiting; weakness.”

Claritin for Children per emedtv website has these side effects:

“In children, side effects include hyperactivity and stomach pain. Side effects are typically minor and easily treated. However, some side effects are potentially serious and should be reported to your healthcare provider right away, such as breathing problems or signs of an allergic reaction.”

Children’s Motrin per drugs.com has these side effects:  

“Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; trouble breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue); bloody or black, tarry stools; change in the amount of urine produced; chest pain; confusion; dark urine; depression; fainting; fast or irregular heartbeat; fever, chills, or persistent sore throat; mental or mood changes; numbness of an arm or leg; one-sided weakness; red, swollen, blistered, or peeling skin; ringing in the ears; seizures; severe headache or dizziness; severe or persistent stomach pain or nausea; severe vomiting; shortness of breath; stiff neck; sudden or unexplained weight gain; swelling of hands, legs, or feet; unusual bruising or bleeding; unusual joint or muscle pain; unusual tiredness or weakness; vision or speech changes; vomit that looks like coffee grounds; yellowing of the skin or eyes.”

This is not a complete list of all side effects that may occur.

Children’s Advil Chew-able Tablets per drugs.com has these side effects:

“Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; trouble breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue); bloody or black, tarry stools; change in the amount of urine produced; chest pain; confusion; dark urine; depression; fainting; fast or irregular heartbeat; fever, chills, or persistent sore throat; mental or mood changes; numbness of an arm or leg; one-sided weakness; red, swollen, blistered, or peeling skin; ringing in the ears; seizures; severe headache or dizziness; severe or persistent stomach pain or nausea; severe vomiting; shortness of breath; stiff neck; sudden or unexplained weight gain; swelling of hands, legs, or feet; unusual bruising or bleeding; unusual joint or muscle pain; unusual tiredness or weakness; vision or speech changes; vomit that looks like coffee grounds; yellowing of the skin or eyes.”

This is not a complete list of all side effects that may occur.

Please Note:There is a complete list of common over the counter drugs and their possible side effects at Drugs.com

Coming Soon- Very Late Valentine's Day Post

I know, I know, Valentine's day was three weeks ago and I'm SO far behind in my blogging. But I promise I will be posting pictures of our V-Day party soon!

Asteroid Fly-By

This Friday we'll be watching the ASTEROID FLYBY: At 12:25 pm (MT) on Friday, Feb. 15th, asteroid 2012 DA14 will fly past Earth only 17,200 miles above our planet's surface. This will put it well inside the orbit of geosynchronous satellites, closer than any asteroid of the same size has come since regular sky surveys began in the 1990s.

We'll be watching it on NASA TV later in the day. 

Here's a simulation of the fly-by...

Playtime: Affectionate, less controlling mothers have strongest relationships with their children

Click below for full article.

Playtime: Affectionate, less controlling mothers have strongest relationships with their children

How to Really Love a Child

An Alternative to 'Time-Out': The Calming Space

It is so very helpful to have a safe, calm space in your home where your child can go to be alone, calm down and de-stress away from the hustle and bustle of the home. This space can be a tent, a corner, a special space under the stairs, a cleared out closet with a door your child can easily open/close him/herself (with no locks), or a room dedicated to calming.

Lighting should be kept low. Night lights, fairy lights, rope lights, holiday tree lights and stringing garden lights are all great ideas.

Supply the calming space thoughtfully, keeping it simple and clutter-free. Ideas include relaxing music or audio books with headphones,  a few sensory items, such as a sensory/glitter bottle (google for ideas), glow sticks, flashlight or a star projector, a few fiddly toys to keep hands busy (and minds calmed), stress ball, and of course a few books.

A poster with faces showing emotions, something inspiring or calming like a scenic view of the ocean or forest, or just a simple heart.

Again, keep it simple. Choose items carefully, making sure there is plenty of variety, and place them in a basket so it’s easy for your child to take care of the space.

Video games, phones, gadgets, DVD players and TV’s have no place in the calming space!

Lay out blankets, some comfy pillows, or a beanbag. These will encourage your child to sit or lie down comfortably. A stuffed animal such as a special teddy bear or other comfort item should be included, as well.

Blank paper, coloring pages and crayons may be calming for older kids. Scents can be calming, too. Add a scented candle, though you won't burn it, and your child can sniff it in to have the same effect, or just let it scent the space on it's own (you can melt down scented candles and remold them without a wick into small candy or soap molds to keep the area scented, too). You can also make a scented sachet or pillow using essential oils or herbs. 

Rotate items as your child grows out of them or is ready for something new.   

At first, explain how to use the calming space and what it is for to your child. It’s a space that is just for them, to use anytime they feel they need it. Let them know their responsibilities, too, like keeping the space tidy when they are done using it. You might ask them to use it in the beginning when you feel they need it, and they will learn to use it on their own after a while. Join them sometimes to model calming behavior and to share some peaceful time together. 

From A Child's Point of View

Look at Me When I’m Talking To You!

Posted on August 21, 2012 by Emily Plank, Abundant Life Children

Hey.  You are Mixing Your Messages.  You know like when I’ve done something that makes you mad?  Like drawing in a book?  Or sitting on my sister?  Or eating the apple pie before dinner?  And you get your body real low to look me right in the face.  And you turn my shoulders so I have to look at you while you are angry with me.  And sometimes I don’t even know why you are angry.  I knowMarkers Are For Paper! but a book is paper and I needed to draw a lizard on that rock in the sunshine.  And I know Your Sister Is Smaller Than You! but I am smaller than you and I can ride on your back like a horsie and she likes the horsie too.  And I know now that The Pie Is For After Dinner! but I was hungry and I don’t know when dinner is coming anyway.

And then you say, Look At Me When I’m Talking To You!  but I want to turn my eyes someplace else because I’m embarrassed but I know you will get madder if I don’t just Look At Me When I’m Talking To You!  Then you talk and talk and talk and sometimes I get distracted by the cat or my friend or a shadow on the wall or the fly that landed on your ear.  Then my eyes go someplace else and you get mad again.

You know those times?  The times when you want my Undivided Attention?

Or when Important People come to visit?  And you talk and talk and talk, and sometimes I need to tell you about the painting in the kitchen or the boats I saw last weekend or my panties that are on backwards.  And you tell me toWait My Turn or Don’t Interrupt Me When I’m Talking.  Or you tell me to sayExcuse Me and I do but you don’t stop talking.  Or you tell me to say Can I Interrupt but you still don’t stop talking.  And when you do give me my turn you have a very heavy breath that tells me I did something Frustrating.

You know those times?  The times when you want me to Not Interrupt!

And then when I am in the middle of looking for my lost green butterfly and you say it’s Time For Singing but I don’t want to come because I am doing something important.  But you tell me Do It Later so I have to leave the spot where I almost saw her fly over a rock.  Then when I am running so hard and fast around the chair and you tell me No Running In The House. Sit Down And Read A Book. and I don’t want to read because of running so fast.  Then when I almost build a castle to the ceiling and then you tell me to Clean It Up Because It’s Lunchtime but I’m not done with it yet.

But I have a problem.  You want me to look at you, even when you are very angry and I don’t want to look at you.  And you want me to wait my turn for talking, even when I have something very important to say.  So why don’t you look at me when I’m doing my very important things before you tell me to stop?  And why do you get to interrupt what I am doing without waiting until I’m done?

Maybe when I am looking for my lost green butterfly when it is really singing time, you could let me keep looking, or you could ask me what I’m doing before you tell me that I have to come and sing.  You could come and look with me or maybe singing time could be after looking for my butterfly time.  Because no one told my butterfly it was singing time and she was almost going to fly over the rock.  Or maybe when I am running so fast around the chair and you don’t want me to run in the house you can tell me to run outside so I can still keep running so fast.  Or maybe when my castle is almost as tall as the ceiling, you could help me save it for after lunch so I can build it later.

If you want my attention then give me your attention,
even if you need me to change activities.

If you don’t want to be interrupted don’t interrupt me,
and if you have to, then help protect my important things until I can use them again.

It might make things a little more clear.

http://abundantlifechildren.com/2012/08/21/look-at-me-when-im-talking-to-you/

Making Music

How cute is this duo?

The Pets

Karma had an upset tummy last week and I woke up to a very big mess in his crate early one morning. Of course it was a work day. That kind of thing happening on a weekend would be crazy talk. So he got the 5 star treatment with a fresh blankie and laundry room accommodations. This was all during the single digits still so as I sprayed the crate down and scrubbed it it just kept freezing and I didn't think I had gotten it clean enough to be brought back in the house for several days.

Of course Hecate was eager to say Hi! to him in his new lodgings. They are friends usually. He likes both the cats, but only one of them likes him back. 

This one reminds me of that movie the Aristocats, with the Siamese cats singing the songs, 'We are Siamese if you plee-ease, We are Siamese if you don't please..."

Fun with Batman

We have these giant magnets that are fun for the kids to use to discover what is magnetic and what isn't. Today Batman visited us to show us how it's done. :-)

Batman found the fridge and metal stools were magnetic. 

Sadly, the castle, tables, cat, Mr. Alligator and Jace were not magnetic. 

Honoring Our Children

Dr. Shefali Tsabary: Honoring Our Children

Beautifully said and so very true!

The Way We Talk to Our Kids

In my parenting classes I teach a specialized workshop on using respectful language as part of a loving parenting approach. Recently I overheard a parent in a store talking to their child is a way that just made me cringe. "Get over here!" "What did I tell you?!" " Do you want me to put you in the cart like a baby?" I do not approach parents in stores and give them parenting advice, much as I would like to, but it did remind me that there are lots of parents who struggle with their own anger, frustrations, stress and other emotions and don't realize how they sound to their children, or what kind of damage they do to their child when they speak to them with hostility, irritation or disappointment. 

I hear from parents in my workshops who say they always felt like their children would simply 'forget' the things they said because they were too young to remember, and it wouldn't affect them long-term, or they thought/hoped their children would simply forgive them or be understanding that they lost their temper. Unfortunately, while children are very forgiving, the emotional and psychological damage words said in anger can inflict isn't always as easy to erase, and the longer it goes on for, the harder it is for the child to recover.

How we speak to our children matters. It matters now, when they are very young, and it matters when they are older. 

In our home, respect is our number one rule. I respect Alex as a person, not just as a child. I speak to him the way I want to be spoken to. That doesn't mean I don't parent or set rules. I do. But we discuss things together rather than me dictating how things will be. I respond to his emotional needs with the same love and respect I would want. His feelings are not treated like insignificant 'things' that aren't real, because I know they are as powerful and as real and my own. Maybe even more, because as a child he doesn't have the regulators over his emotions that I as an adult do.  

Respectful parenting is not permissive parenting. I think parents who were raised with strict or authoritarian parents themselves tend to believe that if they validate their children's feelings, or allow their children to make decisions or ask for their input they are giving up their control, their power. And they are. But that's a good thing! Because parenting respectfully is not at all about power and control. It is about love. When parents fear losing control over their kids, at the root of it what they are really afraid of is their children will grow up and be out of control, they won't be stable, well-adjusted adults. Yet hurting our children emotionaly is the very thing that could cause that to happen. Talking to our kids with love and respect lets children develop into the best versions of themselves. 

Power and control in a relationship is harmful & damaging. It is disrespectful, belittling, condescending, dismissive, controlling or impatient. When we parent this way, it affects what kind of adults our children will one day become, and it affects what kind of parent they will be to their own children. Some parents believe that if they don't physically abuse their children, there is no harm. But our words matter so very much, and should be chosen carefully when we speak to our children.

As an adult, these sentences would hurt my feelings if said to me:

Stop crying.
Knock it off, you're fine.
There's nothing wrong with you. 
Be quiet.Shut your mouth and do what I told you to do.
You'll get over it.
I don't want to hear another word about it.

Whether you are 7 or 70, being emotionally shut down hurts. And yet, in some households these are common phrases used by parents. 

In my workshop, we do an exercise where I have parents close their eyes and picture in three separate rounds, their spouse, boss and one other adult of their choosing- a sister, parent, co-worker, friend, etc.,  saying phrases like the ones above, then rating how they feel after. No one ever rates that they feel supported, loved or respected after doing this exercise. Yet almost all had previously stated at the beginning of the exercise that they had said one, some or all of these phrases to their child at some point. 

Parents emerge from this exercise with a new understanding of how their words affect their children, and a new awareness of the double-standard often accepted by society that lets parents speak this way to kids but not to other adults. If your boss told you to 'Shut your mouth and do what I told you", they could probably be fired, sued for creating a hostile work environment, or you would want to quit. How would words like that make an adult react? You probably wouldn't do your best work for that boss anymore, and you would not have a very good attitude about being at work either. You would certainly have no respect for that person, and you would likely be angry, bitter and resentful toward them for treating you that way. Yet, children can't quit, fire their parents or sue them. They just have to take it and internalize or externalize the damage it causes.  

Children are people first, and deserve our love and respect just as any other person we interact with does. Children deserve to be spoken to the way we ourselves would want to be spoken to. 

Using loving, respectful language with your child helps them achieve positive self-esteem, develops trust, confidence, positive attitudes, healthy relationships, self-love and respect for themselves and others. 

So the next time your child is upset, sad or is telling you they need you, and you are feeling tired, frustrated or stressed, think about the words you want to say and try to imagine how those words would make you feel if your partner, spouse, boss, co-worker or neighbor said them, and adjust your words accordingly to be words you would want to hear in that situation, words that would make you feel loved, respected and valued as a person. 

Painting

I find mini muffin tins to come in handy for soooo many arts and crafts projects. When children begin painting it's important to teach the basics of how to care for their materials. One of those is to help them learn the habit of using one brush for each color, or a new brush when switching colors. If they are taught this, you will have so much less waste and they learn the value of taking care of their art supplies. 

When they are older, they can learn to rinse and dry their brush properly between colors so they don't have to use several brushes, and even how to use a pallet with just a smear of each color to do as they please. But little ones don't quite have the dexterity to manage holding a pallet and painting at the same time, so for now they learn it this way. 

Using just the primary colors, plus the white and black on their own, we made all of these shades and colors! Color mixing is one of my FAVORITE art activities.

Little ones, and even big ones don't always remember to use a new brush for each color, and colors can get mixed and muddy, rendering them unusable for future use. 

I like to dole out small dollops of paint into the muffin tins so if any of the colors do get too muddy it's not the whole paint container that gets wasted. 

Plus it's a little easier for little ones to see and reach all the colors when using the tin. 

If the colors don't get too badly mixed up, I can even stick the tin in a gallon size zip lock and keep it ready for the next time.

For very young toddlers who are not ready to hold a brush or who haven't developed the desire to hold one yet, I like to just squirt some paint onto their paper and let them smush it around and hand or finger paint. Littlest ones shouldn't get left out of art experiences just because they aren't ready to hold a brush! It's a great sensory experience they shouldn't miss out on and a fabulously enriching activity that supports their development.

When we paint, we always have lots and lots of paintbrushes on hand. You really can not have too many brushes! 

Tunnels of Fun

The play tunnels are another one of those toys that I pull out sometimes when we're stuck indoors that I think if we just had THAT and nothing else, the kids would be happy as clams.

And they aren't just for crawling through. In an exciting discovery made last week, apparently they make great silos to fill with toys and stuffed animals. The fun of lifting the tunnel up and watching the tower of toys and animals collapse NEVER gets old. Luckily I have AMAZING kids here who LOVE to clean up! :-)